Gobble 'Til You're Hobbled

I "ran" in our local turkey trot 10k race this morning. It was overcast and a bit warmer (73) than I would have liked but then again it's not like I'm an elite or anything, what does a slow guy care about the weather.

If anything I'm realistic about my abilities when it comes to racing. I have yet to be surprised by having a breakout performance. On the other hand, I'm usually not disappointed when I cross the finish line. I pretty much know how it's going to play out before a toe the line. Maybe all I've really done by this practical approach is limit myself but I don't believe in race day miracles.

X training gets you Y results. If you can't live with that, run more miles and more quality. Right?

It was a huge race with the usual best-of-the-best local runners and also the submarines who surface once a year to clog up the starting line with their spandex, water bottles and fanny packs. I applaud anyone who trots or even walks but I'd clap even harder if these folks would back up a few rows. Gee whiz, I found myself standing behind folks in their cotton docker boy scout pants...

I saw several of the kids that we coach and some that are back from college to visit for the holidays. One of the newer kids from our cross country team had asked me to pace him at 7mm pace. Perfect...I thought that would be about the best I could hope for.

I like acting as a pacemate...it's nice to focus on someone else's race while at the same time keeping yourself honest by being counted on as an even and encouraging guide.

Of course, it did not work out this way. Instead the kid and me were separated just before the start of the race. I staked out a claim behind about 30 rows back from the starting line and had to do the tightrope, balance beam, zigzag 2 minute drill after the gun went off to get around the chubs (sorry). I came through the mile somehow at 6:58.

I haven't spent much time training at this pace and I struggled to get in a rhythm. About 12 minutes into the thing I'm still moving up in the field and I hear someone croak "cooaachh" by my right shoulder. It was my pace kid and I'm not sure what he did to himself in the first mile but the bear was squarely on his back already. "We're right on pace", I offered up, "You're fine, good job (blahblah whatever meaningless crap you say to someone when you know they've had it but you try to help anyway).

That was the last I saw of him.

I passed 2 more of my kids at miles 3 and 5 (don't be impressed, they had probably already run the 5k a half hour earlier).

An old mentor/coach once told me "respiration tells you everything you need to know"...what my breathing told me today is that I am not fit.

Also of note: We saw a dirty man with the Good Book in hand standing beside the course at the 5 mile mark, assuring us all at the top of his lungs that "with God all things are possible".

I didn't mind. I'm not sure how well that was received by the other folks..I could have sworn that someone behind me yelled either "GET A JOB or TAKE A BATH to the poor guy.

The rest of the race was pretty uneventful. I ran even and hard but uninspired. I ran a strong last half mile and didn't get passed by anyone after mile 2. I ran an honest race. I met my time goal.

P.S. I iced all night in order to run today and I'm limping as I have since the last Turkey Trot. It's like ...my standard now.. Run for fun, baby!

The crummy (not really) part of the race part of my total race day experience was that I was handed a finish card at the chute. 123 (One Hundred And Twenty Three). I told you I was a middle of the pack guy. Usually they give "special awards" (a bobble head turkey or something of equal value) to the top 100 finishers. I have a corner of one of our bookcases devoted to these "turkey day prizes".

I walked away from the field with my booty: bananas, cinnamon toast crunch cereal snackies, and famous amos cookies but I didn't turn my race card in because I thought I was 23 places away from "the money".

Later this afternoon I get a call from a buddy congratulating me for getting an award. "I finished 123rd, I didn't get anything man" says dumbarse (me).

"They had a record number of entrants today and expanded the awards to the top 125" says my buddy.

crap...screwed out of a major award (a coffee cup).

Good thing I don't drink coffee or I'd really be pissed.

I got a very thoughtful and much appreciated phone message from a parent of one of my x c girls' wishing me and my family a nice holiday and thanking me for what(ever she thinks) I did to help her daughter out this season. Very touching. It's been a few weeks now since the season has ended and I miss it.

The rest of the day (family, friends, food, football, etc..) was great.

Actually the entire day was great!

Happy Thanksgiving-